5 tips for single parents returning to school
by Dr. Leah
Filed under All, Featured, Single Moms
We’re really impressed when we hear about single parents in college or returning to school on top of job and parenting responsibilities. Bravo to all of you! But, it’s the smart move – especially in this perilous economy. Getting that degree is one of the best ways to gain new skills and move ahead.So, if you’re a single parent in college – or consider returning to school – here are our top 5 tips for success:
Tip #1 – Write Down Your Goals. Make your goals specific. For example, “I will have taken all my required courses by Spring 2013.”
“I will do this by taking two courses each semester and one course during the summer. I will attend every optional career seminar offered, even if it is scheduled on Friday afternoon.” Make a contract with yourself, and sign your name. Promise yourself to move ahead with a well thought-out plan.
Tip#2 – Investigate online education. Online learning is a “best option” for single parents willing to shop around for the best educational buy. Avoiding the child care hassles and extra transportation costs just makes good sense. It’s no wonder that so many single parents choose this option.
Tip #3 – Get Organized. Do not think you can plop your school stuff down on the kitchen table every night. Find a shelf, box, or file cabinet in which to keep your school materials. The kitchen table can certainly turn into your ‘school desk’ at night, but you need a defined, organized place to keep everything. Otherwise, valuable study time is wasted on looking for misplaced things, or items the children somehow managed to ‘borrow.’
Tip #4 – Abolish Procrastination. The best way to manage the inevitable stresses of juggling multiple responsibilities as a single parent in college is to prioritize and NOT procrastinate. Single parents in college do not have the option to procrastinate. Guaranteed, the first time you put off an important school paper, a child will get the flu, and the paper will not be done on time. When your assignments are completed, you can enjoy guilt-free the time away from the pressures of school.
Tip #5 – Learn to Say ‘No’. When returning to school, you must learn to say no to demands that do not help you either 1.) Progress in your studies or 2.) Personally benefit you and your children. Lots of us have trouble saying no. If this is difficult for you, keep a tangible reminder – like a picture of a vacation spot you’d like to visit – somewhere handy to remind you of you will enjoy with your kids thanks to the added income and increased job security.
Now, we’d love to know:
Are you currently working toward a degree? Details, please.
If haven’t made that commitment just yet, what’s holding you back?
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Photo via Flickr: bcd09
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I just started pharmacy school in August after having my son in June (single thru the pregnancy and after). It has been tough, but the support of my awesome family has made it possible. I know that when it’s over (in 3.5 more years), I will be able to make a good life for my son and me.
Having worked at several universities previously, I do want to warn other parents about online education. It’s certainly a viable option, just ensure that the institution is accredited and that the courses will be accepted if you plan to transfer or complete your degree through anOther institution.
I will be graduating in March with an accounting degree and I still cannot believe how far I have come. Deciding to go back to school as a 28 year old single mom was very hard, but I am so happy and proud that I have done it! Can’t wait to graduate! If anyone is thinking that maybe they should do it- it’s hard, but so So rewarding when you are almost to the finish line!
I have an amazing family who has helped out and I provide daycare for other children in order to make money and still spend as much time as possible with my little man while he is growing up so fast. You CAN do it!
Twitter @ http://gawlas.blogspot.com
Thank you so much for posting this article. I have been advocating more education for single parents for as long as I’ve been blogging.
I would echo the warnings about being cautious about online programs. Private or for profit universities will accept almost anyone who will pay. Make sure the school you attend is fully accredited and offers job placement and networking assistance.
In my experience attaining higher education has been a saving grace. The ability to compete for good jobs with decent hours is important to a mom. Greater income is a means to improve our quality of life and independence from needing to rely on state assistance or unreliable child support payments.
Also, it’s nice to have a job I enjoy.
I’m trying really hard to get back into school, but right before I left my GPA had taken a toll for the worst in just one semester. Now I have to take classes just to bring it up so that I can even be considered into a University. With the economy being so bad and schools only accepting once a year, this has been the hardest thing for me to accomplish, but it is definitely my goal for 2012 to not only take classes to bring up my GPA, but then to also get accepted to a University and work towards my BA in Psychology. I’ve started making a plan and as much as I hate it, I might have to only work Part Time, pinch pennies, and take out a Loan so that I can finish my degree. I literally have no help from others and my ex hates that I’m going back to school because he thinks it will inconvenience him, so this will be tough, luckily I only have 2 years or less to finish.
Twitter @ thisiselsa
I am on a second trimester now of my postgraduate study. The good things about this is that I’m on a scholarship so I don’t need to worry about the school fees. However, it challenges me to live apart from my five-year-old daughter. It is the hardest of my almost two year experience of being a single mom so far. If my allowance was enough for me to bring her along and get her educated there, I would definitely have no doubt to bring her along. But the situation was vice versa. I know I have a supporting family, but still it is extremely difficult to be away from her considering that she only depended on me as a parent as her dad is not as attentive as we would expect him to be. So my life now is going back and forth of 1,5 hour flight every fortnight to see my daughter. I got six months left to finish the study so hope things would turn out alright. I hope all these sacrifices would really pay off for the better life of my daughter.
Started going back to college when I left my (then) husband. This December I will have my degree in Education and plan to find an institution that will help me achieve an online Master’s degree. Doing nothing requires no steps; becoming successful starts with just making one!
Twitter @ halenbugbee
Awesome. Going back for my second Master’s degree, this time in Marketing. I chose an online program thru a local accredited school. I am so excited to really get into something I am passionate about. Not excited about have studen loans again but to be competitive in this market a degree (no matter the experience) helps get you noticed.
Twitter @ momma2three99
Thank-you for posting this article! I will be graduating in June and have found that online was the best option for my children and I. Its incredibly hard just being away from them while I work, taking classes online makes it so that I can do my schoolwork while they are at school or otherwise engaged and thus, can spend more time with them.
Procrastination has been the thing I struggle with the most!
Twitter @ martamartin
I just started back to school in December 2011. I was right in the middle of my Masters Program when my son died from suicide September 2010. I didn’t think I was ever going to be stable enough to return to school but after a little over a year break I decided it was time to go back. I only have 6 more classes till I graduate and I am so glad I am physically, emotionally and mentally ready to tackle college again. Sometimes things in your life keep you from getting to where you want to go, but taking a break usually helps get you focused and back on track. At least it did for me.
Marta Martin: We’re so sorry for your loss. Keep us posted on your progress toward your degree – we’re rooting for all single parents in school, but especially YOU!
Twitter @ http://singlemamamusing.blogspot.com
I am also impressed and inspired by all of you pursuing higher education amidst very challenging circumstances. Way to go! Be proud of yourselves, not only of the economic empowerment, but also the example you are setting for your kids (working hard & achieving your goals). I’ve decided to continue my Masters of Ed this summer ( stopped after 2 classes when I got pregnant 3 years ago). I know it will be a long road but I’m excited to get back to it & better provide for my son.
In my mid forties currently going through a painful second divorce. Want to get a degree to be independent and enjoy work that is rewarding. Not sure if I can finance education. Are there grants available to single parents?
I started back to school 6 months after my divorce my son was 1. I have been in school since gettin my prerequisites and an unfortunate broken foot kept me out a year, but now Im back on track. I have my MS in counseling but soon realized I needed a better paying job so I’m getting my nursing degree (RN) and later hope to get my NP degree. I have worked on and off at part-time jobs and I’m currently working 3 and in my last semester of school. It has been tough but I’m so glad I’ll soon be able to support myself and my son without help. And there are tons of financial help out there talk with local unemployment agency or schools they can help you.
I am the 23 year old single mom of a one month old and am taking one class this semester as a prerequisite for the Master’s in Music Therapy program that I am joining in the fall should no jobs come my way. I had started looking into the program before I found out that I was pregnant at the end of March 2011, but things simply weren’t going to work as my due date was so close to the end of the semester. I got my undergrad degree from the same school, but it’s 1.5-2 hours from my home where I have family to support me. I do have friends up that way, but I’m simply worried that I won’t have the really close support system that I need. However, I’m excited about doing the program overall. It is something that I’ve wanted to do for a really long time, and I’m really looking forward to being able to start the degree and get things moving in regards to getting where I want to be in my life. I know that the 2 years this degree will take are going to be hard because my little man will be so little, but I also know that if I put it off for much longer, I won’t do it. It’s a hard choice, but I need to do what’s best for me and my baby in the long run.
Samantha: You’re very inspirational!