Your thoughts on “furry kids”?

by Dr. Leah  
Filed under Dating

3117157474_c2491a9aca_mIf you’ve dated online, have you noticed how often people mention their pets?

“Must love dogs.” Have you read this on profiles as often as we have? This is code for my pets are the priority, don’t you think?

Don’t get us wrong. We love the fact that online dating allows daters to be pet-specific, in order to weed out folks who won’t consider a long-term relationship with a pet owner.

Animal allergies can be a real deal breaker. But have you ever noticed how far some people take this animal-love in their profiles?

“Must love dogs!” is actually an understatement.

Rachel recently read one profile that started off about this guy’s love for black Labrador Retrievers. How cute.

Perhaps not? He wrote that he spends his free time training champion Labrador Retrievers. On weekends, he’s either training his dogs, or traveling to dog shows.

His dogs even chime into this online profile: “Mathilda is my newest dog, and she says that she’d love to go on a walk with you!”

Granted, we really hope this guy finds a woman who shares his love of Labrador Retrievers. Surely, she’s out there.

And, of course, obsessional attachment to “furry kids” doesn’t stop with the guys. Our single guy friends tell us that lots of prospective partners seem to treat their dogs and cats are substitute kids. Apparently, you don’t have to be  collecting Social Security to rate as a “‘crazy cat lady”.

We’re fascinated with this topic and would love to know:

Are you okay with some pets and not others?

Is “must love my pet” a non-negotiable on your love list?

Have you ever dumped someone over disagreements about “furry kids”?

Or have you been kicked to the curb because of conflicts about your “furry kids”?

When it comes to romance….What’s your pet perspective?


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Comments

11 Responses to “Your thoughts on “furry kids”?”
  1. Mike says:

    Twitter @
    While this problem has never come up for me, I do have friends that I think it’s a problem.

    My friend Jen breed and trains dogs and birds which she does religiously nights and weekends. She wonders why she can’t get a date or keep one.

    My friend Michelle has all her dogs and cats sleep with her in her bed. It always becomes a problem when she has a guy sleep over. The animals don’t want to give up there spots.

    Just like kids. Planning is needed from the begining if you have an iota that you will want to date in the future.

  2. Jim says:

    My allergy to most cats makes them a deal killer. I think birds are beautiful. But as pets? They are filthy little vermin. Small rodents are smelly and need constant cage cleaning. Dogs are tolerable if they are outdoor dogs with plenty of free space. But I hate the responsibility of them. I can’t just run off for a weekend without finding someone to feed and walk them. COnsequently, I often see dogs as a problem to be solved rather than a source of companionship and joy. So, while I AM an animal lover, I’m just not a pet lover.

    Jim’s last blog post..Depot Dad’s Karmic Bank Balance

  3. Barry says:

    As an owner of two dogs and four cats, my answer would be pretty obvious. All but one a rescue. (Tip: never tell your kids lets just go into the pet adoption just for fun!) Sounds like a lot but my house is not small and a big fenced in yard. You would never know I had cats. I do believe in keeping the house clean.

    You can tell a lot about a person by the way they treat an animal or pet. They are like a member of my family. One of the hardest things I did in my life was to hold my 16 year old dog when I had to put him down.

    If you don’t like pets (dog/cat), it would be a deal breaker.

    Barry’s last blog post..The 6 Worst Words for a Single Dad

  4. MindyMom says:

    Twitter @
    I don’t mind if a guy has a dog as long as he’s not overzealous with his affection for it and treats it like a dog – not a kid. Cats could be a deal breaker but I’m not allergic, I just don’t care for them.

    I don’t get the get people who place their pet relationships so high in their life or even above a romantic one. To me that indicates someone who can’t have a relationship with a person who can talk back, have an opinion and doesn’t “obey”.

    Obviously I don’t have pets but I had many while growing up.

    MindyMom’s last blog post..Preparing for Change

  5. chai_girl says:

    I have two cats but if the right person came along and he was allergic, then I’d find a good loving home for them. I put people before pets.

    However, I have two friends…one is the crazy cat lady and the other is a non-pet person. The crazy cat lady has 7 cats, a couple with special needs (they have to have medicine twice a day) and thinks nothing of including $600 a month in vet bills in her budget. She considers it to be the equivalent to spending money on daycare, kids clothes, etc. She is single, doesn’t date, and goes straight home from work and only goes out with friends when you plan it ahead of time. She has a complicated routine of putting some of the cats in a bathroom when she isn’t home because they have bladder control issues. I don’t get it and I don’t think she will ever find a guy who is willing to put up with that.

    My other friend has had pets but doesn’t want another because she is so devastated when they pass away. She doesn’t want to commit to a relationship that she knows will end. She is also single and doesn’t date for various reasons but I’m thinking it is similar to the reason she doesn’t have a pet.

    Pets aren’t a deal breaker for me, but as I said at the beginning. I put people before pets. I know for a lot of people they are.

  6. Rachel Sarah says:

    Twitter @
    Chai_Girl: That’s the first time I’ve heard this one… if you met a special guy who was allergic, you’d give the cats away. That says a lot about how you. That guy will be blessed to be with you! But hopefully, he won’t be allergic, right?

  7. Rachel Sarah says:

    Twitter @
    Barry: thanks so much for your thoughtful, articulate comment. I’ll admit to treating my cat like a member of our family… and I get a bit teased for it.

    So, if you’ve dated online, have you included your pets in your profile? Details? Photos?

  8. chai_girl says:

    Oh, he’d have to be pretty special for me to give the cats away. I have to add the caveat that they are mostly my daughter’s cats. I’m just the one that feeds them and cleans the litter boxes. I had to put ~my~ cat to sleep a couple of months ago. She was with me through two ex-husbands and almost 13 years of childhood for my daughter. I’d had her for 19 years.

    Actually, I find my criteria now to be a lot more selfish. I took over both closets in the master bathroom when my ex moved out. Now when I start getting serious I ask myself, is this guy worth giving up closet space for? So far, I haven’t gotten serious with anyone I’d give up closet space for. One did offer to build his own closet, though. But, it didn’t work out for other reasons.

  9. M says:

    I state that I like and own a dog. Also love horses and have owned them. I’m not a nut case over my dog though. MindyMom hits the nail on the head. An animal is just that. An animal. People tend to give them human attributes. My single mom likes my dog, as does her little one, but my dog a pet. A well trained pet. Not a person. She does not jump on anyone, stays off the furniture and she were to live long enough she would not get anything in my will.
    On their worse day the people in our life should always be more important than our pets.

  10. Twitter @
    I don’t currently own any pets, but have had them in the past, and hopefully will in the future as well. I would like to meet someone who is “into” pets, not overly so, however. BUT – if I did meet someone with pet allergies, I wouldn’t let that stop me from dating them.

    MommaSunshine’s last blog post..The Pendulum of Life

  11. Isn’t everything finally about balance . . .into, but not obsessed. Well said, thanks!

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