Does your kid object to PDA?

You thought you were doing everything right.

You waited to introduce your daughter to your new boyfriend until you were both sure that you had a future. But yesterday at the beach, you and your boyfriend were holding hands when your five year old daughter threw a howling fit as she tried to pry you two apart.

Now, you’re confused — and upset. Up until now, you all seemed to enjoy doing things together. Help!

So, when is PDA appropriate when your kids are around?

~~~

The meltdown at the beach is probably a signal that your kid may not be emotionally ready to see you being affectionate — even casually — with your new boyfriend. Trying to delve into the many possible reasons she feels this way might not be productive. Sometimes kids have meltdowns seeming about one thing, when they’re really upset about something else — or just plain tired, cranky, or hungry.

Here’s our advice on public display of affection and single parent dating:

PDA with a dating partner is fine in front of kids. Start slow and take it one step at a time. Walking arm in arm, hand-holding, or having your partner’s arm around you in the movie theater when you are all out as a family are all good ways to start. (Of course, save the hot and heavy for private moments.)

Listening and respecting your kid’s feelings are important. Take it easy for awhile and give your kid a little added time to adjust. It might be better for the three of you to hold hands, considering that your daughter may be signaling by her meltdown that she feels left out. If your daughter lets go, continue holding hands with your boyfriend and let her reaction guide you.

When it comes to older kids, keep age in mind. If your adolescent kids are embarrassed by your affectionate behavior, remember that at this age almost everything Mom (or Dad) does embarrasses them. Make sure, however, that your teen kids only witness behavior you are comfortable having them do publicly.

Remember that your own behavior — not your words — tells your kids what is and what is not appropriate.

Have your kids ever objected to PDA with a partner? Or are they blissfully unconcerned?

Any advice for single parents whose kids might have “issues” with PDA?

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