Can mommy bloggers take things too far?
by Dr. Leah
Filed under Single Moms, Tips & Advice
Today at Single Mom Seeking, Rachel writes about bloggers who’ve turned their sites into infomercials.
Hey, the competition is brutal out there. We understand.
But we’ve also noticed other trends: mommy bloggers who “use” their cute kids to attract more readers. And the increasing amount of graphic detail some mommy bloggers are eagerly sharing about potty anecdotes.
We’re genuinely curious to know what our readers think.
Both of us have noticed a couple of very popular single mom bloggers who’ve posted photos of their toddlers in diapers and underwear. Again, we’re not judging.
We’re simply interested to know if you’re amused by these pictures — or a bit dismayed? Do you ever sense a bit of exploitation in all these ceaseless adorable baby photos? Or do you just enjoy looking at pictures of other people’s kids and see no potential down side?
We’re also wondering if you feel that these mommy bloggers are really being fair to their kids when they offer up every poo and pee detail? Is it okay since many bloggers do not use their kids’ real names?
Or, do you think there will be a kid backlash when these unwitting sources discover how many embarrassing details about them have been revealed? Or do you find these details reassuring knowing that other moms are sharing the same down and dirty experiences that are part of your every day life.
For the record, I was a bit dismayed when Rachel took things way too far by taping a video of her kid asking for advertisers (Rachel had second thoughts about this and took the video down).
I’ve tried to tell her from my perspective how fast kids grow up. I don’t believe that Rachel ever imagined her daughter as the capable and literate tween she is today. It’s a huge shock when your kid looks over your shoulder and says “Don’t write that about me.”
Don’t get us wrong.
For many parents — including us — blogging is a vital emotional outlet and a genuine way to connect with others. We’re a real community. And we’re here together to help each other figure things out.
So, we’re asking you…
Can mommy bloggers take things too far?
Should there be limits on mommy blogging?
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Moms used to gather at the corner park and swap stories about their children.
Then, women began to have a place in the workplace. They would meet in the breakroom, or stop by one another’s desk to share anecdotes.
Now, it has morphed into blogs.
I think women/mothers have been doing the same behvior for eons. We just want to brag about our children! I don’t see how that could be a bad thing…except to perhaps bore those without a connection.
won’s last blog post..Do as I _____ (a fill in the blank)
Of course I’m not a mother, but I do limit what is available about my children. Even the grown ones. The people who I show pictures to are people I know. I’ll show a photo in person, or I’ll send at attacnment to an email, but that’s rare. I know how photos in cyberspace have been aquired and I have no illusions about how secure, or unsecure actually, servers really are. Even the Gov’t, who has a small army of people who’s daily lives are dedicated to protecting Gov’t servers, gets broken into at times.
Not that there are so many people sitting out there trying to get information about our children. But once they pull the information off they have it. Even if it’s things they weren’t looking for, like pictures of some children, they still have it and can do whatever they want with it.
Thankfully we are all free to do what we want. For me, I’ll don’t leave pictures of my children on servers. What they do with their pictures is their business, so long as they don’t post mine (laugh).
Twitter @ aprilabtbalance
There’s one blog in particular that I’ve stopped reading because it felt too much like an infomercial (not a single mom blogger). A blogger who is honest will share their pride sometimes, or use their blogs more as a scrapbook to share their kids’ upbringing. That’s fine, but not usually the type of blog I enjoy reading.
There are certainly some things I leave out of my blog, but it’s more because I don’t want my kids to hate me for what I write.
April’s last blog post..Weekend Wrap-Up
Twitter @ http://www.singlemommyhood.com
Won: This is a fascinating perception! So true:
The sharing that moms once did at the park — and then workplace — has now “morphed into blogs.”
Thanks for pointing that out. (“I don’t see how that could be a bad thing…”)
Do the rest of you agree?
I really don’t consider it exploitation. I mean, if you’re a mommyblogger, people come to your blog to see and hear about mommyhood and the kids. I mean, there should be some limits but I haven’t seen anyone cross those limits yet.
I’m the mom of a teen and I blog anonymously because I believe strongly that he’s entitled to his privacy. If he wants to splatter his face all over Facebook or MySpace (and he does), fine.
I think I can tell stories about him and myself and my friends without inviting the world into their private lives.
Sharing stories and photos with people we know well is one thing; I do not delude myself into thinking that people who read my blog and whom I will probably never meet are the same sorts of friends and will be as kind.
Maybe that’s just me being neurotic mom …
Kat Wilder’s last blog post..Random thoughts Monday
I am very skittish about putting pictures of my kids on my blog. Any pictures I use are old ones. I do write about them, but I try to write in a way that won’t embarrass them in any way, yet still describes some of the issues I am dealing with.
I have been in the media, but always insist that if my kids are filmed and photographed that they be obscured in some way. Its my instinct to protect them, so that is what I do. You just never know.
Abby Carter’s last blog post..Flaky
Twitter @ http://www.singlemommindy.blogspot.com
Won had a great point. I think sharing with discretion is best and it seems to me that is what most bloggers do.
MindyMom’s last blog post..Full Plate
Twitter @ easyridersf
I agree with Won. Moms will always brag, and it will always be a little exploitative. I have never had a boyfriend whose mom didn’t tell me potty training stories.
I also have noticed, just in my own life, that moms tend only to see “adorable child” not “partially undressed child” or even “buck-naked child”. A lot of times we don’t realize, oh, hey, this is inappropriate. The other day my brother in law told me I put a naked picture of my daughter on the internet (meaning snapfish, not my blog). He said there was a picture of her naked on her bed with a blanket covering her lap. My response was, “good, then she was covered.” She’s 3. It’s not like she’s Miley Cyrus, but that’s what Uncle was thinking: Miley Cyrus.
I also agree that, in my own blogging, I do need to remember that my kid is eventually going to learn to read. I was looking over my old blog posts the other day. Which I do because when I first started the blog, my theme was “my kid is super-duper cute” No one was meant to read it except friends and family, and no one really did (on blogspot…hello), but now it has more of a general pitfalls-of-parenting theme (mostly about how PARENTS are getting exploited in today’s society) which means it’s not just grandma reading it anymore. The upshot is that my earlier posts act as an online baby book. The downshot is the online part. I think most of my posts are on the up and up, but I found one about a hilarious diaper fiasco on an airplane that was hilarious at the time, but I can imagine will be mortifying to my future tween. I read it, laughed and then thought, “I need to take this down before she learns to read.”
I didn’t put that story in to lure advertisers of readers, though. The most my blog will ever be is a calling card for my eventual future foray back into freelancing, but I will try not to exploit my kid. If I ever do, inadvertently of course, embarrass her on the blogoshpere, I’ll just sit her down in front of a couple episodes of Nanny 911, so that she knows it could be worse. Much worse.
Melinda´s last blog ..Scuba TV
Twitter @ http://www.singlemommyhood.com
@Melinda: thanks so much for your thoughtful comment — and for reminding us how challenging it can be to balance it all now that most of us are online today. How true about Nanny 911!
I agree with you that at times (myself included), we’ll post stories about our kids — or photos — and not realize how inappropriate they are. Dr. Leah has reminded me often how quickly kids grow up. And it’s so true! You might have potty training toddler today… and before you know it, he’s going to the prom.