A whole new way to think about “online shopping”
by Dr. Leah
Filed under Dating, Tips & Advice
One of the perks about being single today is there are so many ways you can meet men — or women. (Single dads, we encourage you to join this discussion, too).
The old-fashioned “set up” is a great way to meet people. But how often does that happen nowadays?
If you’re new to dating again, we are both huge fans of online dating sites! Between us, we’ve tried Match.com, eHarmony.com, and JDate.com. We’ve learned a lot along the way — and have made some great connections.
The dating drought has been lengthy for many single parents. You’ve probably put all of your energy your kids and careers. But when’s the last time you had coffee with a cute stranger? Or flirted with someone?
The simple exercise of filling out your online profile will help you figure out who you are in this new “life chapter” — and what you’re looking for.
We encourage all of you to start the New Year with some “online shopping.” Are you ready to get those juices flowing?
Many of us (our hands are raised) have resolved to date again in the New Year.
Are you skeptical? Most likely, you’ve already scoured the Internet for the perfect present or that special thing your kid wanted from Santa Claus. Please try to put a little of that same effort into your own life.
We encourage you to take a peek at the online dating sites. This is a great way to get back in the game. With online dating, there are no kid complications and no time pressures. You can “shop” at your leisure from the comfort of your own home.
After all, as they say, it doesn’t hurt to look. As you enter the new year, we encourage you to be more than mommy/daddy. It’s time for you to make your wants, needs, and desires the priority.
Of course, we want to hear all about your experiences!
Are you thinking about trying online dating?
Or, have you already tried online dating? Do you have a dating site you’d like to recommend?
We’d love to know what it has been like for you to go online!
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Did the online dating and to be honest it’s the best thing I’m aware of at this time. Of course it’s dependent on people being honest in how they represent themselves. From my experiences I’ve come to walk away from those individuals who say things that are blatantly false (e.g. doesn’t smoke, but they do). If you can’t be honest about the simple things….
Did Udate (forever ago) when I was traveling to the UK regularly, since Udate is a UK site. More recently (earlier last year) I was on Match. Met a lot of very nice ladies. Only met one who wasn’t entirely up front in her profile. Went on a lot of first dates. One of the great things is you can screen the profile, then email and then talk on the phone long before you ever meet. A lot of information can be gained from the other person (and also provided by you) before you meet. When you finally meet you often have only a few blanks to fill in (photo accurate, kiss well, is there a “physical” attraction, etc…) to know if you want to see this person and get to know them even better.
Eventually I did meet someone who I wanted a second date with. And that turned into a second and third etc… date. Other than online dating where would have a better chance of meeting someone who best fits what you want and you share a lot in common? Without online dating I would certainly never have met the incredible single mother I am now seeing (and being a parent was one of my requirements. People how have never had children fully understand or appreciate the relationship and what it means to be a parent).
It’s like having a catalog to shop for prospective partners in. I wanted an educated mother who enjoyed the outdoors, dogs, horses, etc…(you get the idea). I found a woman with a child, a PhD, who can discuss anything with me (even religion and politics) and we actually debate, but don’t argue about things we may not agree on. Loves camping, etc… Only online dating provides acceptable odds of finding someone like that. Or whatever someone is looking for
Take reasonable safety measures. I don’t give my number out before we’ve exchanged some emails. I don’t meet until I’ve talked on the phone some and learned more about them. First date is usually ladies choice, but I try to have a selection of nice, but rather relaxed places for them to select from if they don’t already have an acceptable place. After that we just see where things go or don’t go.
My advice is just do it. For me it’s been better than clubs, bars, being set up by friends and family, PTA or even church *L*. The woman I’m seeing now is without a doubt the most incredible woman I’ve ever met and would never have met her except for online dating. (Sorry for being so long winded)
M: No apologies necessary! Very interesting to hear your experiences and practical advice. We’re all inspired by your true story of finding love online with such a terrific single mom.
In the 3 years I have been online dating – I have had ONE good experience – the rest were disastrous!! I still browse now and then but it really hasnt worked at all for me!
Twitter @ http://badmummynocookie.com
Been there, done that.
Will never do it again:
http://badmummynocookie.blogspot.com/2009/01/conversation-i-hope-to-never-haveagain.html
Laura: Hmmm . . .not a ringing endorsement of online dating, but one “good guy” is a start. Have your experiences with retro dating (not online) been better?
Bad Mummy: Read your post – terrible and upsetting experience. Unfortunately, meeting crazy people is not an opportunity limited to online dating.
Hope you continue to get out there and meet the terrific person you so deserve. Thanks for sharing your story.
I toyed with online dating but never really got into it. I feel I can get a pretty good feel for someone in person but online there is no way for me to get that “six sense” (if you will) if what that person says is true which makes the first “Date” to stressful in my mind. Honestly, I know I need to loosen up a bit. Jump into the 2009 and get with it, where else am I going to meet my prince? LOL I been watching too many Disney movies again!
Apples: Lot of us have felt the same way. That “online sixth sense” can happen. Stay tuned because we’re going to be dishing on just that topic.